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Vocaloid (Hatsune Miku) – Shosaijou Satsujin Jiken

March 31, 2020

Shosaijou Satsujin Jiken – 書斎城殺人事件 – The Study Castle Murder Case

誰がやったんだ? 誰がやったんだ?
ゆーなゆーなみなまで云うな

dare ga yatta n’da? dare ga yatta n’da?
yuuna yuuna mina made iuna

Who did it? Who did it?
Don’t say, don’t say, don’t let everybody know

慇懃無礼招待状の宛名は探偵ら
文豪の遺稿捜しな
開催地は書斎城 詳細以上
今愉悦の謎解き始まる

inginburei shoutaijou no atena wa tantei-ra
bungou no ikou sagashina
kaisaichi wa shosaijou shousai ijou[1]
ima yuuetsu no nazotoki hajimaru

The passive-aggressive invitation was addressed to “Detectives”
To investigate some posthumous manuscripts
The meeting place was “Study Castle,” no other details
Time to start unraveling a delightful riddle

豪華絢爛頭脳遊戯 女学生も挑む
“助手”の作家を引っ張って
猟奇絢爛脳髄娯楽 その最中
すわ不可能犯罪事件ミステリヰトリック

gouka kenran zunou yuugi jogakusei mo idomu
“joshu” no sakka o hippatte
ryouki kenran nouzui goraku sono sanaka
suwa fukanou hanzai jiken MISUTERII TORIKKU

A schoolgirl challenges this magnificent game of logic
Dragging out the author who is her “assistant”
In the middle of a dazzling amusement for the sensation-seeking mind
Oh my, an impossible crime, a mystery trick!

また灯台デモクラシヰモトクラシヰ
あー先生に訊いてみよっかな
「問題外。君なんぞ戦力外」推理やり直し

mata toudai demo kurashii moto kurashii
aa sensei ni kiite miyokka na
“mondaigai. kimi nanzo senryokugai” suiri yarinaoshi

Though there’s a lighthouse, it’s dark at the foot of it[2]
Ah, maybe I’ll try asking my teacher
“Out of the question. You’re off the team” — The deductions have to be redone from scratch

本格頭脳決戦だ 探偵ばっかで乱戦だ
まったくジャンケンぐーちょきパラノイア
まさか侵入者? もう証拠は隠蔽だ
頭掻いて悩み歩け
這い寄るモノノケぱらいそ楽団 この指とまれ
誰がやったんだ? 誰がやっかんだ?
解いてもみなまで云うな

honkaku zunou kessen da tantei bakka de ransen da
mattaku JANKEN guu choki PARANOIA
masaka shin’nyuusha? mou shouko wa inpei da
atama kaite nayamiaruke
haiyoru MONONOKE paraiso gakudan kono yubi tomare
dare ga yatta n’da? dare ga yakkanda?
toite mo mina made tsutauna

It’s a good old-fashioned battle of wits, a detective-versus-detective melee
A real game of rock-scissors-paranoia[3]
Could this be a trespasser? The proof is still hidden
Racking your brains, walk around and worry it over
The mononoke creeping up, Paraiso Orchestra, stop at my fingertips
Who did it? Who had a grudge?
Even if you figure it out, don’t let everybody know

西方 阿弥陀
西には神楽坂 東にゃ神保町
おさげ 揺れる スカート はためく
妖怪 少年 トンビコート
ホシの所作異常 捜査委譲
ほら“あの子”の推理が始まる

seihou amida
nishi ni wa Kagurazaka higashi nya Jinbouchou
osage yureru SUKAATO hatameku
youkai shounen TONBIKOOTO
HON no shosa ijou sousa ijou
hora “ano ko” no suiri ga hajimaru

Buddha of the Western Pure Land
To the west is Kagurazaka, to the east Jinbocho
Braids swinging, skirt fluttering
Youkai, boys, an Inverness cape
The perp’s behavior is strange; the investigation is transferred
Look out, “that girl’s” deduction is starting

補陀落 自堕落 桜梅桃李 青梗菜
異論 反論 無論 口論 ドロ論破
大混乱からの大団円? 謎が謎を呼ぶ

Fudaraku jidaraku oubaitouri chingensai
iron hanron muron kouron DOROronpa
daikonran kara no daidan’en? nazo ga nazo o yobu

Mount Potalaka; self-indulgence; cherries, apricots, peaches, and plums; bok choy
Objection, rebuttal, of course, an argument, a rhetorical victory[4]
Out of the chaos, a resolution? The riddles bring more riddles

どっちを向いても探偵だ 頭いいのに残念だ
結局何遍やっても怖いのイヤ
作家と舌戦だ 妖怪らと接戦だ
手がかりがそっくり消えた
ふたりは混合禁止の楽団 花一匁
誰が欲しいんだ? 誰がおっ死んだの先生

docchi o muite mo tantei da atama ii no ni zannen da
kekkyoku nanben yatte mo kowai no IYA
sakka to zessen da youkai-ra to sessen da
tegakari ga sokkuri kieta
futari wa kongou kinshi no gakudan hana ichi monme
dare ga hoshii n’da? dare ga osshinda no sensei

Wherever you turn, there’s a detective; so smart, it’s such a shame
After all, no matter how many times I do this I still can’t stand scary things
A verbal battle with the author, close combat with the youkai
The trail of clues vanished completely
We two are orchestras that don’t mix, picking people to join our teams
Who do you want? Who died, Teacher?

雪風 ひゅるらりらん 月花 貴種流離譚
本格頭脳決戦だ 探偵ばっかで乱戦だ
まったくジャンケンぐーちょきパラノイア
まさか侵入者? もう証拠は隠蔽だ
頭掻いて悩むが良い
どっちを向いても探偵だ 頭いいのに残念だ
何遍やっても怖いのイヤー!
這い寄るモノノケぱらいそ楽団 この指とまれ
誰がやったんだ? 誰がやっかんだ?
誰が欲しいんだ? 誰がおっ死んだ?
解いてもみなまで 云うな

yukikaze hyururariran tsuki hana kishu ryuuritan
honkaku zunou kessen da tantei bakka de ransen da
mattaku JANKEN guu choki PARANOIA
masaka shin’nyuusha? mou shouko wa inpei da
atama kaite nayamiaruke
docchi o muite mo tantei da atama ii no ni zannen da
nanben yatte mo kowai no IYAA!
haiyoru MONONOKE paraiso rakudan kono yubi tomare
dare ga yatta n’da? dare ga yakkanda?
dare ga hoshii n’da? dare ga osshinda?
toite mo mina made tsutauna

The snowy wind, whoooosh, the moon and flowers, a lost noble heir[5]
It’s a good old-fashioned battle of wits, a detective-versus-detective melee
A real game of rock-scissors-paranoia
Could this be a trespasser? The proof is still hidden
Racking your brains, walk around and worry it over
Wherever you turn, there’s a detective; so smart, it’s such a shame
No matter how many times I do this I still can’t stand scary things!
The mononoke creeping up, Paraiso Orchestra, stop at my fingertips
Who did it? Who had a grudge?
Who do you want? Who died?
Even if you figure it out, don’t let everybody know

Notes

[1] “Study Castle” is probably playing on an aphorism that “a study is a man’s castle.”

[2] “Toudai moto kurashi” is a saying roughly translating to “it’s dark at the foot of the lighthouse,” meaning that sometimes the hardest things to spot are the ones that are right in front of you. “Toudai demo kurashi” could mean “it’s dark even though there’s a lighthouse here,” but “demo kurashi” is written in katakana, almost identical to the way “democracy” is written as a loan word (it’s using an archaic character). So the line as a whole could be read something like “It’s dark at the foot of the lighthouse of democracy” or “As with a lighthouse, it’s dark at the foot of democracy.”

[3] In the context of rock-paper-scissors, “guu” means rock, “choki” means scissors, and “pa” means paper, so the English translation here actually doesn’t change the wordplay much.

[4] 論破 “Ronpa” means winning an argument, but ドロ論破 “dororonpa” doesn’t really mean anything; as far as I can tell, the wordplay here is based on the fact that Dororonpa is a manga and anime about a ghost girl.

[5] 貴種流離譚 “Kishu ryuutan” is a folklore-studies term for the narrative archetype in which a hero of noble birth is cast into humbler circumstances, goes on an adventure or several, and then is restored to his rightful place.

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